Standing Still
by a-rod48
Summary: A continuation on Brawl in the Family's comic, "Pink Gold Peach" A kidnapping countermeasure goes awry as the Princess is kidnapped by Wario, mistaking her for a solid gold statue. It's up to the Mario and the Toad bros. to rescue her. Comic by Mathew Taranto. Mario by Nintendo.
1. Chapter 1: A sunny day

It was a sunny day in the Mushroom Kingdom, just like any other. Peach was out in the garden picking flowers for Mario, who had recently broke his leg in a karting accident. Wario had come up to the castle to complain about being "ripped off by the royal taxes", even though they were the same ones everyone else paid. The castle guards were having a hard enough time keeping the farting behemoth out.

Meanwhile, Barry, a blue-capped toad and one of the castles many advisors, had come out to the garden with an urgent issue.

"Princess! Word is, Bowser's in town. But this time we've got a plan. Use this!" Peach had looked up to notice he had a small ! block, green with pink lettering. "You know how Mario has a metal cap that will allow him to turn into metal? I made a crown for you! Try it on."

She was a little hesitant, Barry had always devised 'plans' on how to prevent her from being kidnapped. They rarely worked, save the time Cackletta came to the castle to steal her voice. _What's the harm?_ She thought to herself. _Mario uses these things all the time._ She gave the block a quick little punch. Light had enveloped and suddenly she found herself made of metal, not just any metal however. She was, from head to toe, made of pure gold. Albeit with a pinkish hue.

"Great! Now just stand perfectly still for a bit. You'll look just like a **Statue **of Peach, rather than the real deal. You see, my plan is brillian..."

Barry kept ranting, stuck inside his own little world. Peach knew not to interrupt him in his moment of 'triumph', he tended to get his feelings hurt easily. She had to admit, Barry's plan was brilliant this time around. She spotted a pedestal where a bust of her used to sit and decided to make the ruse more convincing by standing on it. After all, isn't a gold statue in the middle of a random patch of flowers a little suspicious?

_I have to stand really still so no-one suspects a thing, good thing Toadsworth had me take those posture classes!_

"See what I mean!" Barry had finally snapped out of his little trance. "Boom! Kidnap-proof!"

"STOP HIM!" Barry turned around to see what the fuss what about, but when he turned back the Princess was gone.

"WAHAHA! I'm RICH!" Wario screamed, running away with his prize in hand. "That'll show those royal losers"

The only person more surprised than Barry was Peach herself. Not only was she being kidnapped by Wario of all people, but she found she couldn't move! She couldn't even call for help. She was as still as a statue.

* * *

**The start of a new adventure! Gotta hope the Princess will be ok, she seems to have trouble with the whole "Not getting kidnapped thing"**

**If I can keep a schedule, this will update every monday.**


	2. Chapter 2: The bad news

**Ok, so maybe I lied. I just couldn't wait until monday to post another page, so I guess I will make the update schedule Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays.**

* * *

"Whoawoahwoah, SLOW DOWN! You're saying Peach was kidnapped by WARIO!?" Mario was furious, the only thing preventing him from blowing a gasket was the pain from a fractured femur.

"Kinda" was all Barry managed to squeeze out.

"Whaddya mean, 'kinda'?"

"I... i mean Wario didn't know it was Peach, at least I don't think."

Luigi, who seemed a little more calm about the situation, chimed in. "How do you not know you are kidnapping a princess?"

"Because I was preventing her from being kidnapped by Bowser! You see, I made a special crown for her so she can turn into metal and pose like a statue. So when Bowser came by, he wouldn't know the princess was right under his nose! I designed it to turn her into gold instead of regular metal, so it would be more convincing. But Wario being Wario probably saw a solid gold statue and had to have it."  
"Congratulations Barry, you successfully designed the world's worst kidnapping countermeasure." Mario had finally calmed down enough to think straight. "Barry, how did you make this crown?"

"Well the main ingredients were a few metal caps and some coins."

"Good" Mario sighed with relief. "The caps will have definitely worn off by now and Wario will be left with a beautiful woman. He's probably returning her to the castle right now."

"Umm, probably not." Barry squeaked, he knew Mario was going to kill him for sure.

"What do you mean, 'probably not'?" If Mario's eyes shot lasers, Barry would be a pile of ash right now.

"You see, I didn't want Peach to return to normal too soon, so I added an Ice flower to stop the reverting process..."

Luigi knew his brother all too well, and with a well timed foot, intercepted a crutch meant for Barry, and continued the conversation as if that didn't happen. It had dawned on Luigi that there was a big hole in Barry's story. _Why didn't Peach just fight Wario off? I've seen her do it at the Smash Bros. tournament countless times . _It took him a moment to come up with an explanation "Barry, Do you even understand how the metal cap works?"

"You put it on and it turns you into metal, right?"

"Not necessarily, once the user puts it on, it reads their intent and carries it out to the best of its ability. If I need to walk through a poisonous cavern, it protects me from the gas. If I want to walk under water, it lets me sink to the bottom. Do you see where I am going with this?"

"So since she wanted everyone to think she was a statue, she's pretty much a statue." For all his smarts, Barry sure felt stupid at the moment. "But why couldn't the cap notice she changed her mind?"

"Probably because you decided to EXPERIMENT WITH THE FREAKIN FORMULA!" Mario had forgotten about his leg, but it was all too eager to remind him about the injury "MAMA-MIA! OUCH! Oooh, that hurt. Anyway, how did you plan on fixing her?"

"Touching a fire flower will cancel out the ice flower. You didn't think I wanted her to be made of gold forever, did you?"

Mario zoned out after that, he knew he had to confront Wario. And soon. He shuddered as he thought what Wario might do to her. Best case scenario, she would be mounted as the figurehead on one of Wario's yachts. Worst case, she would be melted down into gold coins and used in a money bath. At least Bowser never laid a finger on her.


	3. Chapter 3: Faceplants and devious plans

Wario could always use more money, even though he already had a fortune. He had his hand in anything from oil to video games. It was a wonder he would even bat an eye at a gold statue, probably worth less than half a percent of his wealth. But yet Peach was there, being wheeled into the back of Wario's jet.

She had spent the past 3 hours trying to move, or speak, or just get someone's attention. But as hard as she had tried, she just stood there. Not one person knew there was a person under all that gold. Not one person but Barry. _When I get back to normal I am going to have a long chat with that toad._ As the hatch closed on the back of the plane a realization hit her harder than a Mack truck. _What if I never turn back to normal? What if I am stuck like this forever?_ Her mind was reeling from the thought. She sat down on some crates and started to cry. "What if I can't move for the rest of my-"

It had taken her a moment, but she had realized what she just did.

"YES, I CAN MOVE AGAIN! I can walk, and talk and yes YES YES!." The limited space in the cargo hold was the only thing preventing her from dancing her happy dance now. Instead she jumped for joy, her metal feet making a loud clang as she hit the ground. "Now I just have to get out of here and have Barry turn me back to normal." She was about to search for a way out when a security guard came through the door.

"Hello! Who's in here?"

_I am! You have to let me off I-_ . Peach realized she wasn't talking anymore. Nor was she moving. In fact, she was stuck in the same dignified pose as she had made when this whole ordeal started.

"Hmm... I must be hearing things." The security guard said, as he closed the door.

As he left, Peach regained her motor skills. "What just happened there?" The entire time she had been kidnapped, this was the first time she had been alone. Wario had (forcibly) taken her to the airport, she spent two hours surrounded by people in customs, and (without Wario's strength) it had taken a small group of toads to load her into the jet. "So I turn back into a statue when someone is watching, but I can move when no-one is." She could swear she saw this scenario on a TV show once. "Well this is certainly going to complicate things a bit."

The jet had finished taxiing onto the runway and the throttle was opened up, much to the Princess's surprise. She was flung off of her feet and crashed headfirst into Wario's car. As the plane leveled out she realized she had another predicament on her hands. The force of the impact had punched her through the front of the car, all the way to her waist! As she laid there with a facefull of motor oil, all she could do was sigh. "This is going to be a long day..."

* * *

Believe it or not, Mario hadn't the slightest clue how to proceed. Sure Wario's security guards weren't as strong as the Koopa Troop soldiers he was used to facing, but he was in no condition to fight at all. Even trying to put weight on his foot resulted in immense pain.

Luigi couldn't help but notice how down his brother was about the situation, it was worse than when Bowser was perpetrator. "Cheer up bro, you always get your girl in the end, why should this be any different?"

"Have you seen my leg!? I couldn't go save her from the evil king of marshmallows and pillows right now! But I just have to get her back."

"Sure you can't go wail on some baddies right now, but maybe that's the wrong way of thinking about it. What is the princess right now?"

"A statue." Mario wasn't sure where this was going.

"A **solid gold **statue, and where would Wario keep a solid gold statue?"

"In his vault." Mario sighed. "One of the kingdom's most secure places. Thank you Weeg, for reminding me how hopeless this is."

"Nonono, stop thinking about rescuing the Princess." Luigi's smirked at the thought of what they were about to do. "Call up Barry and Ivan, we have a heist to plan."

* * *

**I think Luigi has been watching too much 'Leverage'. I decided the chapters were a little short for just one side of the story each time. So you are getting two for the price of one! Tune in next monday!**


	4. Chapter 4: Shine on

**I would like to thank ED-boi and ToadetteTheBest for such positive reviews! This is my first fanfic so I wasn't sure how it would go. Please feel free to give constructive criticism, people.**

_This is just demeaning!_ The princess thought as a small crew worked to pry her out of the front of the car. _I am a princess, not some possession to be had._ She felt a sudden pull from the harness that had been attached to her waist a little bit ago. Apparently, the work crew had to enlist the help of a couple of forklifts._ Even if I were, not a possession to be handled like this!_

The pull around her waist grew stronger. She could tell they were using thousands of pounds of force, but oddly she didn't feel an ounce of pain. Then as fast as she had flown into the car, she was pulled out.

"Hey! Be careful, that's valuable merchandise there!" Wario may have been a bumbling tub of lard, but he always took pride in what he owned. "Johnson, load this baby onto the forklift and take it down to the shining room. It needs to be spotless for the appraisal next week."

_It._ She thought. _Am I going to be stuck as an "it" for all eternity?_ _Just something pretty to look at? _She was horrified at the thought. _No, I mustn't think like that. Mario will come for me, he always does._ Just as one worry left her mind, another came to take its place. _Shining room? Where are they taking me?_

She was turned around and saw exactly where she was. Warioware HQ. Nestled in the mountains (On the mountain aptly named "Mount Wario").The scenery around here was so beautiful, she hardly had time to take it all in before the forklift pulled into a large building's docking bay. She placed on a handcart and wheeled down to the shining room. While she still felt depressed that everyone around thought of her as just another object in the collection, she certainly was glad she was being handled with a little more delicacy.

As she entered the shining room, she noticed things that made her scream (internally). Workers using special drills, chemicals with names she couldn't pronounce on shelves. Worst of all, a large machine, dozens of warning stickers on the side. 'Corrosive: protective gear beyond this point' 'Do not inspect while powered on' 'Risk of death'. She noticed that was where she was going next. She was hoisted onto a small conveyor belt. A switch was flipped, and in she went.

Once the doors on the machine closed, she regained the ability to move. "Help me! LET ME OUT!" she screamed, but not a single person outside could hear her. As pumps started turning on she realized there was nothing she could do. She just stood there and waited for it to happen. Streams of acid started spraying at high pressures.

"Wow, that feels great!" Her worry instantly dissolved. The shower was one of the most soothing things she had ever felt. "This place specializes in taking care of gold. Why was I worried!" She hummed a little song as she scrubbed away. It was a little weird taking a shower in her dress, but for some reason, she couldn't take it off. It was like it was a part of her body, she could even feel it. By the time the pumps shut down, the shower had washed away all of the dirt and oil she had acquired over the past day. "I have to do that more often!"

Her words turned back into thoughts as the doors opened again and the conveyor belt moved her down to the buffing station. A yellow koopa squirted some chemicals onto a buffer and went to work, starting at the top and working his way down. _Ooh, that feels good. _She thought. You would think having a high RPM buffer applied to one's face would be at least uncomfortable. _I could get used to this!_

After the buffing, the process was repeated with wax. She could see herself in the mirror on the wall. _I look beautiful! I could see why Wario took me. Who could resist?_

* * *

Mario, Luigi, Barry and the yellow-capped Ivan sat at the Mario's table discussing ways to get the Princess back. The four had gone on a few adventures before, each time to save the Princess, but this time was different. There were no castles to take, no platforms to hop or blocks to break. This time, they had to rely on stealth and wit to succeed.

"Can't we just explain to Wario what has happened?" Ivan had just recently been told what was going on. The Bros. and Barry had done a good job keeping the lid tight on this, Toadsworth didn't even know anything was wrong.

"Wario's not a reasonable person, he's not going to just hand us what looks like 10,000 coins to him." Of everyone there, Mario knew the most about his arch-rival.

"I guess asking is out of the question then. How do we bust in?" Ivan always had a penchant for brute force.

"I did some digging in the Royal Library's building index. Per law, any building built in the Mushroom Kingdom has to file their complete building blueprint with Planning Commissioner's office for approval." Barry said with a matter-of-factly tone. He pulled out a large scroll and laid it out on the table. On it were the details of Warioware's headquarters. "The vault is on the basement floor, or should I say, is the basement floor. It is 100 feet high, about 120 yards long, and about 100 yards wide. On the north end is the Cargo elevator, it leads up to the loading dock. On the south side is Wario's personal elevator. It leads up to his office on the second floor. Both of these are probably heavily guarded, so our in is likely the A/C vents along the ceiling."

"Didn't you just say it is a 100 foot drop from the ceiling to the floor of the vault?" Luigi knew it was going to be tough, but this just sounded insane.

"Yeah, I was just pointing out the vaults weak points. How do you think we can get down that far?"

They all sat there thinking about it, then a thought came to Luigi.

"Don't worry it, I know someone that can get us whatever we need."

"Now that is settled, may I point out that building plans won't give us the information we need about security." Mario still seemed pretty pessimistic about the situation.

"We need a man on the inside." Ivan realized. "I remember hearing something about WarioWare. needing a new secretary."

"Well, Wario would recognize Luigi and I, and no offense Ivan, I don't think you're cut out to be a secretary. That just leaves Barry."

"Must I really?" With that comment, everyone shot a death stare at Barry. Luigi's was surprisingly creepy. "I'll go get my resumè."

"So I guess that's all we can do for now." Luigi had said as he walked to the door.

"Where are you going bro?"

"Just going to see a scientist about some gear."

* * *

**Well, guess who has a shiny new princess? Peach ought to open up a metal massage parlor. Also looks like Barry's got a job interview! What do toads wear to job interviews? A new chapter will be posted this Wednesday.**


	5. Chapter 5: Gadd Sciences

It was a slow elevator ride, uneventful too, as (hopefully) most elevator rides are. Though when doors opened Peach was amazed at what she saw. Shelves full of gold, silver, precious gems as far as the eye could see. _This place has more value than a small nation!_ She was probably right about that fact. The workers wheeled her up and down the many aisles, until they finally reached an aisle of busts, idols, and statues. She was put in a small space on the bottom row, next to a silver Wario bust and a group of small golden banana idols.

A worker pulled out a sticker and placed it on the bottom of Peach's dress. 'PS014-029' it read. This affected her more than anything that had happened so far. _A number, is that all I am? _Her heart sank. _I'm just a number on a spreadsheet somewhere? All I'm good for is sitting here, collecting dust?_ In the midst of her existential crisis, she hadn't noticed the workers had left. "NO! You are a princess darnit! Get it together!"

After she regained her composure, she decided to take herself for a little tour. She listened for a bit to see if she could hear any guards or workers nearby. As she realized the coast was clear she headed off.

She was still amazed at the sheer amount of valuables in one room. For a while, the only words that came out of her mouth were "oohs" and "ahhs". There were relics of ages gone past, at least 5 aisles of gold coins, another 3 of gems, and even some things she recognized. "Wow, how did he manage to get the Emerald star?" Sure enough, on one of the shelves laid a star crafted out of emerald, labeled 'ES129-468'. One of the seven Crystal Stars Mario had collected on his adventure in Rougeport. From Boggly Woods, if memory served her correctly.

Then something happened she thought wasn't possible at the time. A small roar came from her stomach. She hadn't eaten in a day in a half! "I am hungry!" She paused for a moment. "What would I even eat? Do I eat normal food?" She decided it was best to go back to her spot for now. On her way back she made note a marked off area labeled 'Outgoing Orders'.

As she made herself comfortable at her spot, she looked to her right and the craziest though crossed her mind. "I wonder..."

As she finished the cargo elevator opened up and a pallet of gold bars was offloaded. The worker stopped for a moment in front of Peach. _Hmm. That's odd_. He thought to himself, noticing the pile of gold banana peels on the ground.

* * *

_"Hello?"_

"Good afternoon Daisy, It's Luigi."

_"Hey there Weeg, what's up?"_

"Actually Daisy, I need your help. Keep it a secret, but Peach has been kidnapped again."

_"You want me to go crack Bowser's skull in, I'm game!"_

"Nothing like that."

_"Aww."_ The orange princess took that as kind of a letdown. Mario and Luigi got to go on adventures all the time and she never got to go along. One of the may burdens of being a princess, she had always thought. _"So what's the sitch'?" _(Side note: Daisy always wished she could be Kim Possible)

Luigi had proceeded to read Daisy in on what was going on. "So if anyone asks, tell them Peach is visiting Sarasaland for a while. Please?"

_"Are you sure you don't need my help getting her back?"_

"I don't see any way you could."

_"Excuse me? You don't see ANY way I could help?"_

"I-i mean uh... we need a small team! Too many people would get confusing. Yeah, that's it." Luigi felt like he dodged a bullet bill there. But to Daisy it hit him center mass.

_"Whatever, I'll run interference for your little game of robbers. Bye!" _*CLICK*

* * *

"The nerve of that plumber!" Daisy was ticked. "I'll show him. BIRDO! GET MY PLANE READY!"

* * *

_Way to go Weegie._ Luigi's relationship with Daisy was solid, though he could tell he just left a small dent. He put his phone in his pocket as he knocked on the Professor's door.

"WHATEVER IT IS YOU ARE SELLING I DON'T WANT - Oh hello Luigi!" The door opened to reveal a short scientist with a small white tuft of hair on his head. His lab coat was covered in grease and dust. "Come in, Come in. Have a seat."

The two walked over to a lab table. On it was a small vacuum cleaner. "Do you like it? I call it the Poltergust-9000! You can suck up ghosts in a heartbeat with this sucker! Hohoho!" Professor Gadd certainly was proud of his inventions. "So, what brings you here?"

"Well, to be frank with you, I need to break in to Wario's vault."

"Well well, I never expected you to take to a life of crime!" The short man certainly seemed shocked.

"Don't worry, I'm not. You see he kidna- er, STOLE something from the castle grounds, and we need to get it back."

"I see, well in that case, come with me downstairs. I have a few things that should help."

* * *

**Smooth, Luigi. Real smooth.**


	6. Chapter 6: Nightmarish appraisal

The past week was filled with boredom. During the day Peach would walk the aisles, looking at various treasures. Sometimes she would sit down at her spot and start braiding her wire hair, all for it to be undone when someone walked past. From her spot she could see things being packed into crates and taken off to shipping. She once tried to hide away in a crate headed to Toad Town. She had made it out to the loading dock when she was discovered by a worker double checking the manifest. The cabin fever was starting to get to her, she often found herself talking to some of the statues on her aisle. The Raphael the Raven statue seemed to have a good sense of humor.

At nights she couldn't wander around, as guards would do patrols. She had to sleep in her statue form since there was no room to lay down.

But today Peach felt a little funny. That's the word she best described it with. Others were 'spread out', 'small', and just 'different'. She couldn't even feel her arms or legs. She had fallen asleep in her spot last night, but now she didn't know where she was. Everything seemed dark, warm and damp. She could tell she was moving, and she could hear sounds outside. Wheels on floors, people chatting, and the distinct 'beep' of a grocery store register. _Hello? Can anyone hear me?_ She tried to say but with no avail.

_Remain calm, just breathe._ She tried to breathe but found she couldn't. Every time she tried to inhale she felt constricted, like she had been run over by a steamroller.

"Ok, It looks like your total today is 22 coins, sir." She heard a female voice say.

Suddenly a light shone down from above and a large hand reached to grab her.

"Will this cover it?" a familiar voice had said.

_Mario? Mario! Help me I-_ _AAAAH!_ She screamed as she noticed what she was. In Mario's hand was a 50 coin piece, the image of the Princess on the front. The only thing different about this coin was its pink coloring, and the consciousness trapped inside it.

"Certainly sir. Money is money after all." The cashier said, as she took the pink coin and dropped it in her till. "You have 28 coins change, have a good day!"

_MARIO! WAIT! IT'S ME! NOOO! _She cried as the drawer slammed shut.

"NO!" she screamed as she awoke. She looked around and realized she was back in the vault, body and all. "Thank goodness it was just a dream!" she sighed.

Her heart was still racing as a group of four workers came down the aisle with a handcart.

"So what are we looking for?" Asked one of them.

Another one pulled out a clipboard. "Says here, 'PS014-029' a pink Princess Peach statue... Here it is."

They pulled up to Peach and attached a harness to her. Using the crane on the cart, they lifted her up onto it.

She was taken to the south elevator this time, which seemed a lot nicer than the one she was taken down to the vault in. One of the workers was chatting about a poker night he was invited to the other day. Something about a rabbit and whatever a 'strong bad' was. He didn't seem happy about it.

The doors opened to an executive office. Pictures of Wario at various events, Even a couple diplomas on the wall. _Who knew Wario had a P.H.D in Economics?_ She was brought into the center of the room as Wario himself walked in, dressed in a nice business suit. Beside him was a short toad with a small briefcase.

"So this is the piece we were discussing? Magnificent!" The toad said. 'Toadington' was embossed on his suitcase.

_Thank you!_

"Yes, but it's no Wario." He said, striking a pose. If she could, Peach would've rolled her eyes.

"Indeed, let's see what it's worth. Shall we? How much does it weigh?"

Normally this question would offend Peach, but even she found herself wondering what she weighed. One of the workers pulled out a clipboard. "Looks like it's 2,825 pounds 4 ounces."

_WHAT! Wario carried me here by himself!_ Peach knew he was strong, but that was just ridiculous.

"Let's see here, using normal conversions. That much gold would amount to... 45,200 coins."

"Not bad. I have certainly earned less in one go." Wario said with a look of approval.

"I'm not done. This isn't gold." Toadington pointed out. "This is pink-gold. One of the rarest substances on the planet."

"Wow, so what's it worth?"

"2800 pounds of pure pink-gold is worth ten times as much, so you are looking at 450,000 coins."

"It's worth how much?!" _I'm worth how much!?_ Both Wario and Peach were dumfounded.

"Hold on now, it being a sculpture severely depreciates its value. As it is right now, on the market you would be able to get about 75,000 coins." Toadington certainly knew his stuff. And while Wario was disappointed about how much the value dropped, he knew his 'investement' (read: theft) was a good one. But Wario wasn't the type of man to settle for good.

"Ok, Thank you for your time Toadington, we will have your payment in the mail shortly." Wario was a different man when it came to his business. He almost seemed civilized. He turned to the workers, "Take it to reclamation." There was the Wario Peach knew.

"Yes sir!" The worker with the clipboard said as they wheeled the Princess out of the room. Through the front door instead of the elevator.

Peach was definitely a wise person, but for the life of her she couldn't remember what reclamation was. _Reclaim, to claim or demand the return of. To bring back to a preferable manner of living. _She paused for a moment to consider the last definition. _To bring into a condition for other use. Toadington said pink-gold was more valuable in it's pure form. _She finally figured it out. _NO!_

The workers carried on through a set of double doors labeled 'Reclamation'. It was a large room with multiple furnaces and presses. Gold and other metals would go into a furnace, come out of it molten, and be poured and pressed into coins. Her worst nightmare was coming to fruition.

* * *

"So basically your job is to schedule appointments, take phone calls, and check I.D.s as people come into the facility." The former secretary was happily coaching her replacement, Barry.

"Seems simple enough." Barry was confident. Not only was he helping the Princess, but getting a second paycheck too!

"Sure, you keep thinking that. If you have any troubles, call me." she handed him a small business card.

"Thank you, enjoy retirement!"

"Ohoho, I certainly will young man."

As she left, Barry plugged a small flash drive into the computer, one with a Gadd Sciences logo on it. A small dialogue box popped up onto the screen. It simply said "Run? Yes/No". After clicking yes, a progress bar and a chat box opened. He typed into the chat.

Blue: I'm in.

Red: Good, we are getting the files.

On the other end was Red and Green, or Mario and Luigi. He started to look over the details of Wario's staff and security. 720 employees, 75 of them security staff. The Vault crew consisted of 15 security guards patrolling the shelves from 9:00pm to 6:00am, but surprisingly there were no guards in the vault during the day. There were two guards at each of the buildings 12 entrances, 4 at the entrance to Wario's office, and 4 at the cargo elevator. So it seemed their plan of attack would be the ventilation after all, but they would have to do it in broad daylight.

Green: Blue, is the air conditioning system computer controlled?

Blue: Hold on a moment.

Barry was digging into the files when the phone rang. "Thank you for calling WarioWare Inc. This is Barry, how may I help you?"

"Hello." The woman on the phone spoke very professionally. "I would like to speak with Wario about purchasing an item in Wario's personal collection."

"Sure!" Barry said. "Let me transfer you." After transferring the call he went back to his research.

Blue: Yes, it is. In fact I can control it from here.

Green: Good, now open the file named 'Destroyer 6000' on the flash drive. Once it is open, click on the climate control window.

Blue: Ok

He proceeded to open the file, and his cursor turned into a bomb, stylized to look like Professor Gadd's head. Once he clicked on the control window, the fuse on the bomb lit and counted down. '3...2...1... Have a good day!' The window was gone. As well as the icon to launch the application. 5 seconds later he heard the air conditioning unit shut down.

Blue: Ok, what did you just have me do?!

Red: I believe Green just provided us with a way in.

* * *

**Looks like the princess is in trouble! Will she be rescued in time? Or will Mario need to get into coin collecting? Find out on Monday!**


	7. Chapter 7: The Kiss

Peach's heart started to fill with dread as she was placed in a small gondola leading into a furnace. _I have to get out of here! _She tried with all of her might to move but still found herself motionless. As the furnace drew closer she began to lose hope. _This is it, isn't it? _She thought. All at once fear overcame her, fear of a fate worse than death.

_Being a statue was bad enough, but at least I am still me. After this I'll be nothing more than loose change. Just coins to be put in blocks, left in parking lots, or lost between couch cushions. Pieces of me will be spread across the Kingdom! People will wonder what happened to their poor princess while the use me to by a soda at the gas station!_

As the gondola pulled into the furnace, she sat down and started to cry. The heat started to get to her. She could feel a change inside her, not one of melting. In fact a cool chill shot through her. She could feel the temperature drop as she got back to her feet. _What's happening?_ As ice started to cover the gondola, she recognized the feeling.

* * *

It was a few months back. Her birthday party, actually. All of the Kindgom was celebrating the occasion, though only her closest friends were invited to her private party. Mario had insisted she save his present for last. He always knew exactly what to get her.

"Go ahead, open it!" Mario said with a smile.

"Okay then." Peach grabbed the box. It was cool to the touch. She pulled on the ribbon and opened the box. Inside it was a blue flower. "What is thi- HEY!" The Princess had looked up to receive a snowball to the face. Thrown by none other than Mario, wearing a light blue cap and shirt, with red overalls. One by one, Luigi, Toad, Toadette, Daisy, and Rosalina pulled out flowers too, as they did their clothing changed to a light blue or white color.

"Go ahead, grab the ice flower, if you dare." Mario taunted.

That birthday was the best snowball fight of her life, despite it being summer.

* * *

_So Barry made this thing with an ice flower, how nice of him._

The gondola pulled out of the furnace, and instead of pouring out molten pink metal, it unceremoniously dumped Peach out onto the floor. A worker noticed this and pressed a red button, and all at once the movement in the facility stopped. "Woah, never seen that before." He said, waving down some other workers and grabbing a cart.

A couple of them looked inside the furnace and noticed there was a solid sheet of ice inside. "Wow, who decided to turn our furnace into a refrigerator? Hey guys come look at this!"

After a little bit, Peach was set back up and hoisted onto the cart. "Hey! This thing is ice cold." A devilish smile came across the koopa's face. "Hey Benny, I will give you 50 coins if you kiss this."

"Sure!"

_Eew, don't kiss me you creep!_ Of course no one could hear her object, so Benny walked on up and kissed her on the lips. That is where his lips were frozen for the next 20 minutes. As the guys were laughing their shells off, Wario came down to see what the commotion was about.

"What the heck is going on down here? I thought I told you guys to melt this thing down." Fortunately for Benny, Wario couldn't see him behind the statue.

"We were sir, it went through the furnace and it froze. There is literally a good 3 inch thick sheet of ice in there."

"Don't lie to me." Wario was not amused.

"We aren't sir, look for yourself!"

Wario climbed up and took a peek, and sure enough, there were icicles everywhere. "Wow, what caused this?"

"We think it's the statue. Benny hasn't been able to unstick himself from it for the past 20 minutes.

Wario noticed the koopa, lips stuck to the statue. "WAHAHAHA! Oh, man that is rich." It took him a moment to stop laughing. "Seriously though, get him unstuck and get back to work. I don't pay you to goof off."

"Yes sir!" they all said.

_Yes, please get this fool off of me, and never speak of it again._

"Oh and send your makeout partner there down to shining. I am glad it didn't get melted down, we have a buyer."

While the past hour was traumatic for the Princess, at least she got another spa day. She just hoped they would wash her mouth out with industrial strength cleaner.

* * *

The next day everyone at WarioWare inc. was sweating. Despite being up in the mountains, being without an air conditioner was terrible. They had to shut down smelting and reclamation operations just to try to keep the temperature down. Wario looked at the thermostat. "102! This is ridiculous!" He grabbed his phone and dialed a few quick numbers.

"Hey uh, Burnie!"

"_It's 'Barry' sir."_

"Yeah whatever. Call a repairman to fix the darn A/C thing. It's hotter than Dark Land in here!"

"_Actually sir, I took the liberty of calling them yesterday when it broke, they should be here in the hour."_

"Good job! I should give you a raise!" Wario wasn't going to give him a raise.

"_Ok sir, anything else I can do for you?"_

"That's it." Wario said as he hung up the phone.

Meanwhile, downstairs. Barry clicked on the small chat box and started typing.

Blue: We're on.

* * *

**So it begins.**

**I knew that a near death experience would make for a pretty dark chapter so I figured, "Why not have some fun". Interesting fact, Benny now holds the record for longest kiss with a Princess. Next chapter will be up on Wednesday!  
**


	8. Chapter 8: The Heist

Everyone was in position. Down the road from WarioWare, in a white van, Luigi and Ivan were suited up in repairman's coveralls. Gear stuffed in their duffel bags. Mario was at home in front of the computer, monitoring the incoming camera feeds. The previous night, he saw the Princess being wheeled out of the shining area and down to the vault. Unfortunately for him, there were no cameras in the vault. But he could see everything that came and went.

"_Mic test! Red reporting_." Mario said over the headset.

"_Green reporting_"

_"Yellow reporting_"

"_Blue reporting, signal clear._"

"_Green, are you ready to test the pixellator_?"

"_Affirmative Red"_

"_No need to be so dang official there, Green_."

"_Okey-dokey, testing in three, two, one." _Luigi pointed the pixellator camera at their test, a small pillow, and pressed the button. Bit by bit the pillow was sucked into the camera until it was gone completely.

Next to Mario, the other camera let off a small beep, as small white blocks came out of the lens and assembled themselves into a pillow.

"_How'd it go, Red?"_

_"Soft as ever. We're good to go. Happy hunting!"_ Mario sure hoped everything would go off without a hitch.

5 minutes later the van pulled into the parking lot. The two 'repairmen' hurried up to the roof of the building.

* * *

The princess couldn't sleep at all the night before. Instead of her usual spot, she was placed in the area marked 'Outgoing orders'. She remembered the day before Wario said he had a buyer for her. "Who am I being sold to?" At this point she was getting used to being a thing. It scared her a little, but at least she was a thing to be admired.

Then she had a lightbulb moment. Sitting on the desk was a shipping label with her number on it, and no address filled in. She was so excited she didn't hear the cargo elevator come down. Just as she was about to write, she froze. _No! I was so close! _She felt a harness being attached to her again, but this time she was lifted up and wrapped from head to toe in bubble wrap, taped tight around her. Then everything went dark as she was placed into a crate and it was sealed shut.

* * *

"Ok, I'm in position, tell me when." Luigi was in the vents above the vault, ready to be lowered down by Ivan.

"Hold on, there are still people down there. Wait for my signal." Mario watched the cameras diligently, looking for the workers that had gone down earlier. After a couple of minutes the workers came out of the cargo elevator, taking a crate to Wario's airstrip. "Go now!."

Slowly but carefully, Ivan lowered Luigi down to the floor. "He's down" Ivan said as he brought back the rope and exited the vents.

"Ok, Blue. Do your thing." On Mario's order, Barry clicked another icon on the flash drive 'Electro-Zapper'. A diagram of the building's wiring appeared. He selected the 'scissors' tool, and cut power to both elevators. Ensuring Luigi had as much time as he needed.

Luigi wandered the many aisles, looking for the Princess. He took note of almost every item in the vault, tempted to take the lot. _No Luigi, that's not right. Some of it may be stolen, but most he earned on his own. You can't just take someone' s hard wor-._ He spotted something that cut him off mid thought. Up on the shelf, the Emerald star. _That's not good. If Wario actually knew what that was, who knows what he might do._ "Red, no sign of Pink yet, but you have an item incoming." He whipped out his pixellator, and in an instant, the star was gone.

Behind Mario, the familiar stone materialized. "Mama-mia, how did he get a hold of that!" _Don't distract yourself, you have a mission._ "Thank you Green, Item received. Now get back to the search."

Minutes passed by, Luigi had searched the vault five times over, but no Peach. "I'm telling you Red, Pink isn't here."

"She has to be there, there's no way she could've left... unless." Mario rewound the camera footage, until. _There! _He paused at the workers who came out last, he hadn't noticed before, but the crate they had was about 7' tall and 2' wide. About the size that could fit a statue. "Barry!" Mario said hurriedly, forgetting the use of codenames. "What's shipping out today?"

He pulled up a list. "Quite a bit, 500 lbs of gold bars, 50,000 copies of 'Smooth Moves', a wood carving to go to a pizzeria... Oh crap."

"What! What!" Everyone begged Barry to finish his sentence.

"One life size Princess Peach statue, buyer anonymous."

Mario searched frantically through the cameras for the crate. "There it is! Shipping dept. About to be loaded onto a truck. GO GO GO!"

"Hey Blue, can you redirect my pixellator to the shipping cameras?" Luigi knew he had to get there fast.

"On it!" It took only a few clicks to get the route planned out. "You're good, go!"

Luigi set the pixellator to self-pixellate. And faster than you could say selfie, he was gone. He never liked the feeling of being split into pieces. He couldn't really help it with so much at stake. In the shipping department, to the surprise of the workers, Luigi rematerialized.

"Ok, Green you are looking for a crate 7'x2'x2'. Go get her bro!"

He looked around, bemused workers wondering where the heck he came from. _There!_ He spotted it, on a conveyor heading to a semi trailer.

"Hey! You! Show me your Identification."

Luigi turned to see a small squad of security guards running at him. He took off for the box, shoving workers out of the way. He set the pixellator on the table next to the belt, set for five seconds. "See ya L-ater!" He taunted, as himself and the crate disappeared.

"Oh, thank spaghetti you made it back!" Mario was overjoyed to see Luigi and the crate sitting on the living room floor. Ivan and Barry were already there. Each having their own pixellator camera. "Alright, let's get her out of there." Mario said, handing Luigi a crowbar.

* * *

**A plan in action! Come back on Saturday for the conclusion.**


	9. Ending 1: Homecoming

**Now you may be asking. "Why is this ending one?" Well, dear reader, I am done writing this story for now, but If I ever have the hankering, I might write out a continuation. Now ON WITH THE SHOW!**

* * *

"Welcome home Princess!" They cheered, as the crate was pried opened.

"Wait, what?" Barry, as well as everyone else in the room, was shocked to see a wooden carving of a red-haired woman, holding a 'Mona's Pizza' pizza box.

Mario's jaw hit the floor. "Where's Peach? Luigi, I thought you said you had her!"

"I thought I did! This crate was the exact size you told me."

Mario hopped back to the computer and rewound the video feed. He watched as the workers took a crate from the vault, and loaded it onto an orange plane. "We, we failed. She's gone." With that statement ringing through his mind, Mario grabbed his crutches and went into his room.

*Knock knock* "Hey bro, cheer up! The princess is just in another castle. We can still go get her!" Luigi tried to comfort him, but all he heard behind the door was silence. "Barry, Ivan, pour through what we've got and see if we can find that plane. "

Three hours later Mario finally came back out of his bedroom, to find the remaining three hard at work, trying to find Princess Peach. "Thank you for not giving up guys." He sat back down at his computer, depressed, yet determined to find the princess.

As they worked, a knock came at the door. Luigi put down his laptop and got up to answer it.

"Hey Daisy! What are you doing here?"

"Oh, I just wanted to congratulate you on a job well done!" She certainly seemed chipper, but that faded as she saw the looks on the boys' faces. "Oh, so you don't have her yet. Well I'm sure you guys have been working hard, let me take you guys out for a drink. You probably need a break."

"Hey? Where are we going?" Mario said from his wheelchair. Daisy knew he couldn't walk so she offered to push him there. Luigi, Ivan and Barry followed closely behind.

"I figured we could raid Peach's tea cabinet at the castle. I doubt she'll mind."

"Ok, then." It seemed kind of wrong, going to drink tea at the castle without Peach. But Mario didn't want to hurt Daisy's feelings.

"So how'd it go down guys?" No one wanted to talk about it, but Daisy seemed to insist.

Ivan was the first to speak up. "Well, we sent in Barry to be our inside man. He disabled the air conditioning, and called me and Luigi to fix it."

"After I called them, they made their way through the vents to the vault."

"I was the one who went into the vault, but by that time, the Princess was already packed up for shipping to some buyer."

"I wonder who would want to buy a Peach statue?" Daisy mused.

Mario continued. "So we sent Luigi after the crate using the pixellator, a kind of teleporter. But when we got the crate and returned to the house. We realized it was the wrong one. The right one was loaded onto a plane."

"Well, that's one heck of a story there fellas." Daisy said as they walked into the castle. "So I did some digging of my own, and I think I know who this mystery buyer is."

"Really?" "Who is it?" Everyone begged her to spill the beans.

"I did." Daisy announced. The five rounded the corner into the tea room to find at the end of the room stood a pink-gold Princess Peach statue..

Jaws hit the floor. Ivan even started to cry.

"So Luigi, there's no way I could help?" Daisy said with a smirk. Only to be tackled by a hug from Luigi.

"Barry, give me the fire flower." Mario said, taking the fire flower. He wheeled himself over and placed it into the Princess's arms.

Peach felt a warm wave flow through her. As the hindrances on the metal cap were lifted, she bent down and hugged Mario. "Oh, Mario"

"I missed you too Peach... but I already have a broken leg. Please don't break my spine too."

"Sorry, Mario."

"Princess." Barry spoke up, "It seems the fire flower freed up your movement, but you still have to wait a few hours for the metal crown to wear off."

Luigi was the first to put two and two together. "Hey, if you were just going to buy her off of Wario, why did you make us go to hell and back?"

"You said I couldn't help, you didn't think I would let that slip, did you?"

They all shared a few good laughs, Peach told her side of the tale while they sipped tea. But they were interrupted when a loud crash was heard in the next room. "Where is the Princess?" All six of them knew that voice. "Follow my lead." Peach whispered to the gang.

Bowser busted into the room, ready to try and take the princess for his own." Where is the Princess Peach?"

"She's not here, Koopa breath. Now buzz off!" Daisy certainly was not a woman to be trifled with.

Bowser thought it a little weird that they would have tea with a Peach statue instead of Peach herself. "You guys are weird. Where is she then?"

"She is on official business in the Waffle Kingdom. Now, I may be in a wheelchair, but I still can kick your shell six ways to Sunday. Now leave before you get hurt."

"I'll be back! Next time, your butt is mine." He walked back to his Clown Car and flew off.

Barry was shocked. "I can't believe that worked! Haha, I'm a genius!"

"I have to admit Barry, you did a good job." Praise from the Princess was music to Barry's ears. "Next time, make sure I'm not so valuable."

"Tell me about it! I had to drop 150,000 coins on her!"

"While I was there, I was appraised by a professional. In that professional's opinion, you got ripped off." Peach giggled.

"Well, since I technically bought you, that means you have to come back to Sarasaland with me, maybe invite Rosie over for a sleepover."

"Sounds good, you're buying the snacks."

_Peach is right._ Daisy thought. _I did get ripped off._

* * *

**So Peach is home, Bowser's been thwarted, and everyone is happy! That is until those bananas she ate come back to bite her... Thanks for reading!**


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